COUNSELING?  I TOUGHT THAT’S WHAT

THE BIBLE IS FOR?

 

INTRODUCTION

 

A.    The Bible is clear when it comes to its all sufficiency for our lives.

1.      Psalm 119:105

 

Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path.

 

2.      II Timothy 3:16-17

 

All Scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:  that the man of God may be perfect, thoroughly furnished unto all good works.

 

3.      II Peter 1:3

 

According as his divine power hath given unto us all things that pertain unto life and godliness, through the knowledge of him that hath called us to glory and virtue.

 

B.      Because the Bible is all-sufficient, some will argue that there is no need for a person to go to counseling.  This is why we have the title and subject matter for this discussion today.  “Counseling?  I Thought That’s What the Bible is For?”

 

I.                   LET’S LOOK AT THE BIBLE A MINUTE

 

A.    There are some things in the Bible that are very explicit.

1.      Expression of anger (Eph. 4:26).

 

Be ye angry, and sin not:  let not the sun go down upon your wrath.

 

2.      Forbidding the practice of homosexuality (Rom. 1:26-27).

 

For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections:  for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature:  and likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompense of their error which was meet.

 

a.      Vile affections

b.      Against nature

c.       Burned in their lust

d.      Working that which unseemly

e.       Their error

3.      As long as a person abides by the teaching, all is well with his/her life.

4.      What happens when a person fails to obey?

a.      A person cannot control his anger

b.      A person engages in homosexual behavior.

5.      Some will say:  “Well, he needs to repent and ask God for forgiveness.”

a.      This is true.

b.      But, the word “repent” means:  “change.”

c.       How does the person change?

B.      There are times when the Bible sets forth principles instead of specific commands.

1.      Examples:

a.      Self-denial (Luke 9:23)

b.      Humility (James 4:10)

c.       Kindness (Eph. 4:31)

2.      Questions:

a.      How are these principles to be implemented in our lives?

b.      How do you make these a part of your life when they have never been part of your life in the past?

 

C.     A problem:  Most Christians have not studied the Bible very well.  They do not know how to rightly divide God’s Word in order to use it for their benefit. 

1.      What passages deal with grief?

2.      What passages deal with depression?

3.      What passages deal with clear thinking?

4.      What passages deal with husband and wife relationships?

5.      What passages deal with issues stemming from abuse, such as self-esteem?

 

D.    NOTE:  Counselling often provides the link between the individual and the application of God’s Word in his life.

1.      The counsellor becomes a spiritual teacher or mentor.

2.      He is similar to the minister who helps the church to make application of the Word of God to their lives (Ex., study, II Tim. 2:15, How do you study?).

 

II.                THE BIBLE DOES NOT CONDEMN OUR HAVING COUNSELLORS

 

A.    Does anyone have a friend? 

1.      The Bible teaches friendship (Prov. 18:24)

 

A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly…

 

2.      Friends often provide us with counsel, and rightly so (Prov. 27:9).

 

Ointment and perfume rejoice the heart:  so doth the sweetness of a man’s friend by hearty counsel.

 

3.      Jonathan and David (I Sam. 23:16)

 

And Jonathan Saul’s son arose, and went to David into the wood, and strengthened his hand in God.

 

B.      How many of you are Christians who have brothers and sister in Christ?

1.      In the Bible, there are responsibilities that Christians have with each other.  Sometimes we refer to these duties as “one another” responsibilities.

2.      Two for illustration:

a.      Comfort (II Cor. 1:3-4)

 

Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort; who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God.

 

 

 

 

b.      Encourage (Heb. 3:13)

 

But exhort one another daily, while it is called To day; lest any of you be hardened through the deceitfulness of sin.

 

C.     There are several problems, however, that we must deal with when we go to our brothers and sisters in Christ.

1.      They do not understand the nature of our problem.

2.      They believe that the fix to problems should be quick.

3.      They do not have the time to help us.

4.      They do not have the skills necessary to assist us.

5.      They do not always keep things confidential.

 

D.    We are exhorted to seek counsel (Proverbs 11:14; 15:22; 24:6)

 

…in a multitude of counsellors there is safety.

 

III.             THE BENEFITS OF COUNSELING

 

A.    Counseling names and labels things so that we can understand them.

1.      When God confronted Adam after his sin in the Garden of Eden, he said:  “The woman whom thou gavest to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I did eat.”

a.      What do we call what Adam did?  Answer:  blaming

b.      Blaming is a “defense mechanism” that enables us to protect ourselves from blame and harm.

2.      Anna Freud came up with a list of many defense mechanisms that men and women use to defend or shelter themselves. (See Handout).

 

B.      Counseling gives us methods whereby we can obey the Word of God.

1.      The Bible teaches us to listen (James 1:19).

2.      The Bible teaches us to control our anger (Eph. 4:26).

3.      The Bible teaches us to repent of sin (Luke 13:3).

 

C.     Counseling helps us to overcome the difficult.

1.      How do you get a drug addict clean from his addiction?

2.      What do you do for someone who has schizophrenia?

3.      How do you help a parent whose child has oppositional defiant disorder?

4.      What do you do with a person who has bi-polar disorder?

 

D.    Counseling provides some basics that are needed to assist others.

1.      Personal contact that can be trusted

2.      A safe environment

3.      Expertise in dealing with certain psychological problems

4.      Access to other services if needed

5.      Time to assist

6.      Accountability

 

 

 

 

 

 

CONCLUSION

 

A.    There are some dangers associated with counseling.

1.      There are some nine different counseling perspectives. 

a.      One question that all entering counseling need to ask is their counselor:  “What is your approach to counseling?”

b.      When they give you an answer, research that approach for yourself.

c.       Some will say they take an eclectic approach.  If so, ask:  “What is your primary approach to counseling among all of the methods you use?”

2.      Some counselors see everything from a secular viewpoint (Ex., divorce, homosexuality).

3.      A lot of counseling is based upon feelings. 

a.      “How do you feel?” 

b.      There is no advice or direction.

4.      Counseling is based upon the ability to pay.  A lot of people get a much better diagnosis when the funds for counseling are run out.

5.      There have been some counselors who have gotten too involved with their patients.

6.      There are a lot of psychotropic drugs involved in treating disorders.  They must be properly managed.

7.      Weekly sessions (50 minutes) can take months and years to do much good.

8.      The good in counseling comes from the sincerity and willingness of the client who needs the counseling.

 

B.      Counseling does not have to oppose the Bible.

1.      It can work in harmony with the Scriptures.

2.      It can help hurting people conform their lives to the teachings of the Bible.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

10 Key Defense Mechanisms

Sigmund Freud's daughter, Anna Freud described ten different defense mechanisms used by the ego.  Other researchers have also described a wide variety of additional defense mechanisms.

Displacement

Have ever had a really bad day at work and then gone home and taken out your frustration on family and friends? Then you have experienced the ego defense mechanism of displacement.

Displacement involves taking out our frustrations, feelings, and impulses on people or objects that are less threatening.

Displaced aggression is a common example of this defense mechanism. Rather than express our anger in ways that could lead to negative consequences (like arguing with our boss), we instead express our anger towards a person or object that poses no threat (such as our spouse, children, or pets).

Denial

Denial is probably one of the best-known defense mechanisms, used often to describe situations in which people seem unable to face reality or admit an obvious truth (i.e. "He's in denial."). Denial is an outright refusal to admit or recognize that something has occurred or is currently occurring. Drug addicts or alcoholics often deny that they have a problem, while victims of traumatic events may deny that the event ever occurred.

Denial functions to protect the ego from things with which the individual cannot cope. While this may save us from anxiety or pain, denial also requires a substantial investment of energy. Because of this, other defenses are also used to keep these unacceptable feelings from conscious awareness.

In many cases, there might be overwhelming evidence that something is true, yet the person will continue to deny its existence or truth because it is too uncomfortable to face.

Denial can involve a flat out rejection of the existence of a fact or reality. In other cases, it might involve admitting that something is true, but minimizing its importance. Sometimes people will accept reality and the seriousness of the fact, but they will deny their own responsibility and instead blame other people or other outside forces.

Addiction is one of the best-known examples of denial. People who are suffering from a substance abuse problem will often flat-out deny that their behavior is problematic. In other cases, they might admit that they do use drugs or alcohol, but will claim that this substance abuse is not a problem.

Repression and Suppression

Repression is another well-known defense mechanism. Repression acts to keep information out of conscious awareness. However, these memories don't just disappear; they continue to influence our behavior. For example, a person who has repressed memories of abuse suffered as a child may later have difficulty forming relationships.

Sometimes we do this consciously by forcing the unwanted information out of our awareness, which is known as suppression. In most cases, however, this removal of anxiety-provoking memories from our awareness is believed to occur unconsciously.

Sublimation

Sublimation is a defense mechanism that allows us to act out unacceptable impulses by converting these behaviors into a more acceptable form. For example, a person experiencing extreme anger might take up kick-boxing as a means of venting frustration. Freud believed that sublimation was a sign of maturity that allows people to function normally in socially acceptable ways.

Projection

Projection is a defense mechanism that involves taking our own unacceptable qualities or feelings and ascribing them to other people. For example, if you have a strong dislike for someone, you might instead believe that he or she does not like you. Projection works by allowing the expression of the desire or impulse, but in a way that the ego cannot recognize, therefore reducing anxiety.

Intellectualization

Intellectualization works to reduce anxiety by thinking about events in a cold, clinical way. This defense mechanism allows us to avoid thinking about the stressful, emotional aspect of the situation and instead focus only on the intellectual component. For example, a person who has just been diagnosed with a terminal illness might focus on learning everything about the disease in order to avoid distress and remain distant from the reality of the situation.

Rationalization

Rationalization is a defense mechanism that involves explaining an unacceptable behavior or feeling in a rational or logical manner, avoiding the true reasons for the behavior. For example, a person who is turned down for a date might rationalize the situation by saying they were not attracted to the other person anyway. A student might blame a poor exam score on the instructor rather than his or her lack of preparation.

Rationalization not only prevents anxiety, it may also protect self-esteem and self-concept. When confronted by success or failure, people tend to attribute achievement to their own qualities and skills while failures are blamed on other people or outside forces.

Regression

When confronted by stressful events, people sometimes abandon coping strategies and revert to patterns of behavior used earlier in development. Anna Freud called this defense mechanism regression, suggesting that people act out behaviors from the stage of psychosexual development in which they are fixated. For example, an individual fixated at an earlier developmental stage might cry or sulk upon hearing unpleasant news.

Behaviors associated with regression can vary greatly depending upon which stage at which the person is fixated. An individual fixated at the oral stage might begin eating or smoking excessively, or might become very verbally aggressive. A fixation at the anal stage might result in excessive tidiness or messiness.

Reaction Formation

Reaction formation reduces anxiety by taking up the opposite feeling, impulse, or behavior. An example of reaction formation would be treating someone you strongly dislike in an excessively friendly manner in order to hide your true feelings. Why do people behave this way? According to Freud, they are using reaction formation as a defense mechanism to hide their true feelings by behaving in the exact opposite manner.

Other Defense Mechanisms

Since Freud first described the original defense mechanisms, other researchers have continued to describe other methods of reducing anxiety. Some of these defense mechanisms include:

Acting Out: In this type of defense, the individual copes with stress by engaging in actions rather than reflecting upon internal feelings.

Affiliation: This involves turning to other people for support.

Aim Inhibition: In this type of defense, the individual accepts a modified form of their original goal (i.e. becoming a high school basketball coach rather than a professional athlete.)

Altruism: Satisfying internal needs through helping others.

Avoidance: Refusing to deal with or encounter unpleasant objects or situations.

Compensation: Overachieving in one area to compensate for failures in another.

Humor: Pointing out the funny or ironic aspects of a situation.

Passive-aggression: Indirectly expressing anger.

Fantasy: Avoiding reality by retreating to a safe place within one's mind.

Undoing: This involves trying to make up for what one feels are inappropriate thoughts, feelings, or behaviors. If you hurt someone's feelings, you might offer to do something nice in for them in order to assuage your anxiety.

 

 

https://www.verywellmind.com/defense-mechanisms-2795960