CHILDREN MUST BE DISCIPLINED

Victor M. Eskew

 

            Children enter into this world as helpless, innocent little human beings.  They are a blank canvas.  They can be easily molded and developed into just about anything at an early age.  Parents need to be aware that there are thousands of forces that are eagerly waiting to shape their children.  One of those forces is God.  However, He has left the responsibility of molding children into the image of His Son in the hands of parents.  To godly parents, the wise man speaks these words:  “Train up a child in the way he should go:  and when he is old, he shall not depart from it” (Prov. 20:6).  Strong gives us an interesting definition of the words “train up.”  He says the Hebrew word means “to narrow.”  Wax is narrowed into a mold to form an image.  A lump of clay is narrowed to produce a vessel.  In like manner, children must be narrowed.  Strong goes on to say that the word means “discipline.”  It is through discipline that children are molded into servants of God. 

            The discipline of children begins with example.  An example is a mold or pattern to be followed.  At an early age, little ones are influenced by the attitudes, the words, and the behavior of their parents.  If their parents yell, they yell.  If their parents throw tantrums, they throw tantrums.  If their parents are sloppy, they are sloppy.  If their parents are kind, they are kind.  If their parents are helpful, they are helpful.  If their parents are interested in God, they are interested in God.  Yes, parents begin molding their children by means of their example.  Four times in the Biblical text, we read the phrase:  “And he walked in all the ways of…”  (I Kings 22:43; II Chron. 17:3; 28:2; 34:2).  I Kings 22:43, refers to Jehoshaphat, the king of Judah.  “And he walked in all the ways of Asa his father; he turned not aside from it, doing that which was right in the eyes of the Lord…”  II Chronicles 28:2 has reference to Ahaz, the son of Jotham, king of Israel.  Here is how he is described:  “For he walked in the ways of the kings of Israel, and made also molten images for Baalim.”  Children have a tendency to follow in the footsteps of their parents.  It behooves mothers and fathers to sets powerful, positive examples before their children in all aspects of life, especially their spiritual lives.

            A second element of discipline is teaching.  Both the Old Testament and the New Testament exhort parents to teach their children the ways of God.  To the parents of Israel, Moses set forth this admonition:  “And these words which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart:  and thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.  And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes.  And thou shalt write them upon the posts of thy house, and on thy gates” (Deut. 6:6-9).  In the New Testament, Paul stresses that fathers need to take the lead in teaching children His ways.  “And, ye fathers provoke not your children to wrath:  but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord” (Eph. 6:4).  Timothy had been instructed in the Lord’s way from a tender age according to II Timothy 4:15.  “And that from a child thou hast known the holy Scriptures, which are able to make thee wise unto salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus.”  That teaching paid off because Timothy eventually became a companion of Paul on his missionary journeys (See Acts 16:1-3).  There are two things that we want to emphasize to parents about teaching.  First, the instruction a child receives through the church is not enough spiritual training.  Second, there needs to be intentional teaching on a daily basis that a child receives at home. 

            A third component of discipline is application or activity.  It is one thing to be taught to do something.  It is another thing to actually do it.  Teaching a child to pray is one thing.  Having the child actually pray is another.  Teaching the child to be a servant is one thing.  Having the child serve is another.  Teaching the child to be an active member of the church is one thing.  Having the child to be an active member is another.  The Bible says that Jesus came to seek and to save that which was lost (Luke 19:10).  He gathered about Him twelve men, apostles, who were taught His ways so He could send them forth to the lost (Mark 16:15).  However, during His earthly ministry, He sent them out on what some refer to as “The Limited Commission.”  “These twelve Jesus sent forth, and commanded them, saying, Go not into the way of the Gentiles, and into any city of the Samaritans enter ye not:  but go rather to the lost sheep of the house of Israel.  And as ye go, preach, saying, The kingdom of heaven is at hand” (Matt. 10:5-7).  This was good experience for these men.  It would prepare them for the greater mission that would take place after Jesus ascended back to heaven.  Most disciplines of study have internships.  Parents need to put their children through internships while they are at home.  They need to help their children gain experience in the things they have learned. 

            A fourth area of disciple involves punishment.  Even the Lord knows that this is essential in the training of His children.  “For whom the Lord loveth his chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth” (Heb. 12:6).  The wise man tells us that “foolishness is bound in the heart of a child” (Prov. 22:15).  He also tells us that “a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame” (Prov. 29:15).  The cure is the rod.  “Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him” (Prov. 22:15).  And again:  “The rod and reproof give wisdom:  but a child left to himself brngeth his mother to shame” (Prov. 29:15).  Parents MUST use the rod.  Those who do not are violating God’s law.  They are also setting their children on a path of destruction.  In I Samuel 2:12, Eli’s sons are introduced to us.  “Now the sons of Eli were sons of Belial; they knew not the Lord.”  These men perverted the sacrifices and lay with the women who assembled at the door of the tabernacle.  Because of their iniquity, the priesthood would be removed from Eli’s house.  Eli was to blame for much of his son’s evil.  Of Eli the Lord said:  “For I have told him that I will judge his house forever for the iniquity when he knoweth; because his sons made themselves vile, and he restrained them not” (I Sam. 3:13).  Eli was their father, their priest, and their judge.  He used none of his sources of authority to restrain his sons.  He failed to discipline them.  Thus, they became worthless men, sons of Belial.  Parents, restraint and punishment are a must.  It is not easy, but those who fail here will regret it.

            When parents chose to have children, they take on a huge responsibility in the sight of God.  They are obligated to mold their children.  They must provide wholesome examples.  They must give their children sound teaching.  They must give their children opportunities to put their teaching into action.  And, they must punish their children when they swerve from the mold into which they are being poured.  If parents fail to mold their children, others will.  There are literally thousands of forces eagerly waiting to form and fashion them into ungodly vessels.  Parents, do not let that happen!  Train your children.  Bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.